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Things You Should Accomplish by 35, According to Twitter

Anna Brown — Thu, 31 May 2018 08:00:23 +0000

It’s never too late to do great things in your life. Some of the most successful people in the world started their careers late in life when they were older and more mature. However, we often feel like we’re pressured to get things moving as quickly as possible. Here are some tweets that show the realistic side of life and the real accomplishments you can expect by your 35th birthday.

By age 35 you should have started noticing uncomfortable similarities between you and your parents that you swore you would never be like

— Amadeus (@Amadeaux) May 25, 2018

By age 35 you should have at least one potato masher in a drawer that prevents it from being opened.

— JadedinBlue (@jadedinblue) May 22, 2018

Listen. Meghan Markle wasn't a duchess til age 36 so stop telling me what I should have by age 35.

— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) May 21, 2018

By age 35 you should have an entire cabinet filled with Tupperware containers. That don’t match. Just a bunch of random bottoms and tops that come cascading out on you every time you open the door.

— Danielle H (@FoodosaurusRex) May 22, 2018

By age 35 you should have at least two thirds of your hard drive space taken up by recursively nested copies of the hard drives from all your previous computers

— Alex Kerfoot (@akerfoot) May 20, 2018

"By age 35 you should have double your salary saved."

35 year old me: IM SUPPOSED TO HAVE A JOB?!?

— A-Train (@aaronLebeahm) May 21, 2018

By age 35 you should have reached that stage of time confusion where you're convinced the 90s was only 10 years ago.

— Jen Williams (@sennydreadful) May 21, 2018

By age 35 you should have a collection of excuses for cancelling plans and a system in place for how to realistically rotate them.

— MehGyver (@AndrewNadeau0) May 22, 2018

By age 35 you should have a huge box of cables but you can't throw them out because you're pretty sure you still need a couple of them but you're not sure which ones

— Lori G (@LoriG) May 19, 2018

By age 35 you will have lost track of how old you are. "I am 35 this year, right," you'll say, but you won't be certain. You won't be certain of anything.

— Mark Magark (@markedly) May 24, 2018

By age 35, you should be ready for bed. All the time. The earlier the better. In fact, just stay in bed the whole day.

— David Lewis (@davidclewis) May 22, 2018

By age 35, you should have lost most of your real life friends to misunderstandings, changing priorities, distance and unknown reasons and found a few hundred online strangers to laugh with.

— equa-nimmi-ty (@nimmypal) May 22, 2018

by age 35 you should have a kitchen cabinet dedicated entirely to plastic bags that contain other, smaller plastic bags

— vytas (@peakysblinder) May 20, 2018

By age 35 you should have at least 40 years experience for a junior entry level job.

— Pips (@Pips801) May 24, 2018

By age 35 you should run into friends and say "WE SHOULD HANG OUT SOON!" twice a week. You will never hang out. You'll just scream this at each other until one of you dies.

— Luke Trayser (@trukelayser) May 20, 2018

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